:)

There's no room to share my feel again. Closed for the diary.. :)

-_-

Bad day ever -_-
Hmmmmm -_-"
Why always feel this? Whatever I had said never you hear, never you care. Just think that I never tell anything. How I can like to ask you if you always never hear me? You just want I hear you but you never wanna hear me. Always always and always !
I've told to you. Who said that? ME! You just think I'm a little girl that can't do anything, isn't it? I'm not a child!! I can do that! Why no one trust me? Is there something wrong in my face? Is there something wrong? Just tell me why you always do that!
And then why always everything that's not true alwayss alwayss and always supposed I do the wrong? Why always me? I just like to be your doll that can close you fault and I do that fault. That's not my fault please. Why no one trust it? Is my face like a criminal? That's not funny! I'm not stupid like you think, I have a brain which is functional, full functional! I hate it!! Really hate ...!
Such as a little bastard you know. How dare you are ...

.....

Yah yah yah..
I don't know what should I do. I'm just feel very tired with everything in my life...
Anybody can answer 1 my question. So easy question.... When I can feel free and be my self again? Just it....
Maybe this is like a crazy question, but it's from my heart. Why I must feel this? Why just me feel this? Why me? There's someone beside me, why don't her? Why me? Why always me? Why everything that I do always wrong, always false, always always always me?? Why I can't say what I feel? Why I can't say everything such as I'm not in this place? Why I can't feel comfortable like I'm in another place and with another people? So different... Such as be a different people... Just like a trash.....
How long I must be a different people like this? So tired...
Maybe 4 years again I must feel like this.. ohhhhhh God.. Give me a power.
Hmmm, maybe just a miracle that can make me strong to do all of this. So long time, so long, so tired, so hate, really really hate all of this. Really hate myself. Don't know what should I do now. Cry? That's not enough! You know how much my tears that ever fall because it? Such as not important again in my life! Really not important and just make a trouble!!! Like a troublemaker.. hahahaha
And now I know that I can be a different girl when the situation like this...
Really difficult to smile when your heart is broke you know..
So easy to speak but so difficult to do.... :')